Finding Your Voice: Navigating the Cultural Divide for Asian Women in the U.S. Workplace

March is Women’s History Month, a time to reflect on the progress women have made in owning their voices, speaking up, and advocating for themselves. Growing up, I always celebrated International Women’s Day, yet I didn’t realize until much later how cultural norms shape the way women express themselves—especially in the workplace.

One of the biggest cross-cultural challenges for Asian women professionals in the U.S. is speaking assertively and directly. Many of us come from cultures where hierarchy, indirect communication, and harmony are deeply valued. The idea of “playing big” and asserting authority can feel uncomfortable or even unnatural. But learning to navigate this cultural gap is essential for professional growth and leadership.

The Cultural Foundation of Assertiveness

Recently, I was listening to a powerful podcast about the “powerful pause”—the idea that career decisions for moms, whether returning to work or choosing to be a stay-at-home mom, should be about what I want, not just what benefits my family. This resonated deeply with me because so often, women—especially those from cultures that prioritize family and collective success—hesitate to put themselves first, unapologetically. 

This hesitation extends beyond personal choices and into the workplace. In my coaching work, I’ve seen countless international students and immigrant professionals doubt their expertise: “I’m not experienced enough.” “My work experience from my home country doesn’t add much value here in the US.” These self-doubts lead many to stay silent in meetings, avoid self-promotion, and ultimately, what Tara Mohr calls “play small”.

A Personal Journey: From Soft-Spoken to Assertive

I vividly remember my first time studying abroad in Copenhagen. I was shocked that students didn’t have to raise their hands to speak in class. In some discussions, you just chimed in. One of my professors even required everyone to contribute regularly. Initially, I hesitated—I wasn’t used to speaking up without being explicitly invited to do so. But over the semester, I gained confidence and learned to assert my thoughts more freely. That experience planted the seed of transformation, one that continued to grow as I entered the workforce.

Shifting from Playing Small to Playing Big

How do we pivot from hesitation to confident communication? Here are a few strategies that worked for me:

1. Trust Your Expertise – Instead of focusing on whether your ideas are “good enough,” reframe your mindset to sharing knowledge and exploring better solutions. When you believe that your expertise benefits others, speaking up becomes easier.
2. Identify Your Strengths – Find aspects of your job that excite you. Are you great at translating data into actionable insights? Do you thrive in connecting people and resources? Position yourself as an expert in those areas within your organization.
3. Tailor Your Assertiveness – In Eastern cultures, communication is often indirect. Instead of saying, “No, I can’t do that,” you might tend to say, “Perhaps we can look at next Wednesday instead?” While this style can be effective, balancing it with assertive communication is key in Western workplaces. A tailored example would be “Sorry I can’t do that today. But I can work on it first thing on Monday”. Practice setting clear boundaries while maintaining diplomatic language.
4. Rewire Your Risk Perception – Assertiveness is closely tied to how much risk we feel comfortable taking. If we grow up in environments that encourage speaking up (think of the “show and tell” routine in US schools), we naturally develop that confidence. But if we come from cultures where speaking too boldly might have negative consequences, we become more hesitant. Recognizing this difference can help us actively build a new baseline of confidence.

Owning Our Voices

The journey to assertiveness isn’t about discarding our cultural values but about adapting authentically. As Asian women professionals, we can learn to own our voices without losing our core identity. We can embrace confidence while maintaining respect, and we can stand up for ourselves while still valuing harmony.

This Women’s History Month, let’s commit to playing big. Not just for ourselves, but for the generations of women who will follow in our footsteps.

What’s one step you can take today to assert yourself more confidently at work?